Oh, how awful. Did he at least die painlessly? …To shreds, you say. Well, how is his wife holding up? …To shreds, you say. I’m just glad my fat, ugly mama isn’t alive to see this day. We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.
Oh, I think we should just stay friends. Perhaps, but perhaps your civilization is merely the sewer of an even greater society above you! I usually try to keep my sadness pent up inside where it can fester quietly as a mental illness.
Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar. Kif might! Bender?! You stole the atom. Is the Space Pope reptilian!? How much did you make me?
Shinier than yours, meatbag. A true inspiration for the children. So, how ’bout them Knicks? If rubbin’ frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don’t wanna be right. That’s not soon enough! Oh, I always feared he might run off like this. Why, why, why didn’t I break his legs?
So I really am important? How I feel when I’m drunk is correct? I guess because my parents keep telling me to be more ladylike. As though! I’m a thing. There, now he’s trapped in a book I wrote: a crummy world of plot holes and spelling errors!
Interesting. No, wait, the other thing: tedious. You’re going back for the Countess, aren’t you? Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.” It may comfort you to know that Fry’s death took only fifteen seconds, yet the pain was so intense, that it felt to him like fifteen years. And it goes without saying, it caused him to empty his bowels.
Ummm…to eBay? Say what? Aww, it’s true. I’ve been hiding it for so long. You won’t have time for sleeping, soldier, not with all the bed making you’ll be doing.
Hey, what kinda party is this? There’s no booze and only one hooker. Tell them I hate them. Interesting. No, wait, the other thing: tedious. Hello, little man. I will destroy you!
If rubbin’ frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don’t wanna be right. You guys go on without me! I’m going to go… look for more stuff to steal! Hi, I’m a naughty nurse, and I really need someone to talk to. $9.95 a minute.